My name is George Lawrence Boone. I am a 23 year old professional waste of life. I like granola bars, Diet Lipton Green tea (with citrus!), Miller Lite (official beer of The Dallas Cowboys), and Lays potato chips. I prefer Wavy Lays, but the spicy BBQ flavor does not come pre-waved, sometimes I have to make sacrifices. Oh yea, and whiskey, from Kentucky. Video games don’t take up most of my free time anymore, now I’d rather go workout for a few hours than spend hours playing video games. I mean, after all, swimsuit season is upon us. Don’t get me wrong though, if you want to jam out with your clam out to a little Rock Band with me, I won’t back down.

I am single, yes. Do you want to date me? Probably not. I am what some would call an “asshole.” When I get in a relationship I tend to lose interest quickly, then feel trapped and freakout, and finally make some horrible excuse to do something else besides spend time with you. Here are some of the better excuses I’ve made to cancel plans with a girl:

1. Kentucky just lost. I don’t feel like doing anything.
2. The playoffs are on.
3. My phone didn’t ring. (Actually happened, I tend to pick out shitty phones.)
4. You don’t want to go to Hooters? That sucks.

Feeling trapped could be described as, “I was out last night and this hot cougar was eying me… She can satisfy my needs better than you can. I think.”

I do like more things than chips, video games and tacos. Sports are a huge factor in my life. Some of my favorite teams are:

1. Kentucky Wildcats
2. Dallas Cowboys
3. San Antonio Spurs
4. Dallas Mavericks
5. Phoenix Suns (Used to be 4 until Amare came back, I really don’t like him.)
6. FC Dallas… Just kidding. Soccer isn’t a real sport.

I also enjoy cooking a lot. Sometimes (rarely) I post recipes or pictures of some new type of food I’ve created. I think there has to be some type of Italian heritage in my family somewhere, because I absolutely love olive oil and pastas. And organized crime… And prostitutes.

My family is a huge deal to me. Even the crazy ones who we don’t talk to. Because they’re weird. Did I ever tell you about the time my uncle shot shit out of his ass 20 feet? Well, he did. He’s not even the weirdest one in the family. Both of my brothers live in Texas still, where my parents are living in the house we have lived in since I was 7 years old. Robert, Tim and my parents are living withing 15 minutes of each other, sort of like a triangle.

One of the big reasons I moved back to Texas was to spend more time with my family. I sometimes have this strange dream of my dad dying at an early age and I just decided I had to move back home in the Summer of 2007. Also? That whole “no insane liquor laws in Texas” thing.