A conversation held the Saturday before last after going to eat at Texas Land and Cattle (who has the best smoked sirloin… IN THE WORLD!)
Me: I asked Tim if he wanted some Jambalaya while we were watching the game, but he said he didn’t want to have gas later.
Dad: Can you imagine having your drawstring [...]

When someone with a nasal-y voice says “sectional tension” it usually sounds like “sexual tension”.
Which naturally leads to tension in the classroom… Especially when it’s the teacher saying it.
And on that note I leave you with this picture.

I declare this week… Fart week!

I removed the video with looping song, everyone can stop crying now! I’m really tired so I’m just going to leave you with a taste of some of the hilarity that ensued Friday night.
Setting, outside on the balcony of my friends’ apartment.
Me: I gotta fart before I go back inside.
Jason: Is it gonna [...]

68.161.188.22 - IP address of previously mentioned doucher. If you’re interested. They obviously have nothing better to do since they came back to comment… AGAIN! That much fun on a Friday night huh? Must be awesome to live the life you live.
Tonight was one of the most entertaining nights of my [...]

So I’m checking my statcounter just now… “8000 hits what the hell?”
I didn’t even know she linked me…. anyway, best comment so far from random trolls on Dooce.
“You’re still a consumer douche with no life.”
I know I’m a consumer whore, but do I go around spreading hate on people’s blogs for no reason? No… [...]

Click here for video proof
Mmm lazy eye!
P.S. I LOVE that song.

My mom must still think I’m 12 years old because she rounded up most of my rated R movies and hid them around the house.
REAAAAAAAAAAAAAAL COOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL.
This and DirecTv giving me some bs about them not being able to give technical support on alternate HD channels has just pissed me off royally.
I haven’t been this angry [...]

I sold my soul for an XBOX 360 tonight (you can tell it’s 2am, I just typed sole at first, but I remember that I ended up keeping my shoes… for now.) Yea I paid 100 dollars more, so what it’s the crappy neutered version… I still got one!! I’LL JUST BUY A HARDDRIVE [...]

Deja I didn’t know your boyfriend was Asian? He’s the one on the left, right? Since he’s Asian he knows Yao Ming right? Can he hook it up with some tickets or what?
I know this has been posted on the internet 4000 times over, but I planned on posting this about a [...]

People that do need an XBOX 360 next week
1. George Lawrence Boone

People that don’t need an XBOX 360 next week
1. Paris Hilton

Is the droopy eye thing a side effect from VD? Am I the only one who notices it? I mean COME ON!
2. Justin Timberlake

“Hey I’m wearing a cool hat and will probably [...]